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An American's Adjustment to Life in Riyadh

by Carol Fleming (American Bedu) - 01/23/2010

"Carol Fleming shares her own experience of her arrival and adjustment to Riyadh as well as providing tips and guidance to other expats on things to do and see."

Of all the places I ever expected to settle down in, Saudi Arabia was not on the original list. However after meeting and falling in love with my Saudi husband and following a five year courtship spanning over five countries, we married. Our married life did not immediately start in Saudi Arabia. First I resigned from the U.S. Foreign Service as I had been an American diplomat for 20 years. Then I joined my new Saudi husband who happened to be a career Saudi diplomat who shortly after our marriage was transferred to the Saudi embassy in Washington, DC. Yes, it would have been a direct conflict of interest for both of us to continue in our diplomatic careers and represent our respective countries while married to each other. Therefore I made the transition from being a principal officer of the U.S. government to the supportive spouse of a Saudi diplomat.

Having spent much time in the Muslim world and associating with individuals from the Arab world I was comfortable and familiar with Saudi customs, cultures and traditions before arriving in Saudi Arabia.

My husband and I spent four years in Washington, DC before we went as a married couple to Saudi Arabia. Although we would settle in the capital of Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, our first stop as a couple in Saudi was to Makkah where we performed umrah together. The next important stop was spending time with my husband’s mother and his extended family especially as it had been ten years since my husband had last lived in the Kingdom. This was a good opportunity for me to get introduced and get to know my Saudi extended family. They made me warmly welcomed and I was pleased that we had finally arrived in my husband’s homeland. Once we had our own home set up, I was eager to explore and discover the shifting sands of Saudi Arabia and see what kind of treasures would be revealed.


After a one month sojourn in Makkah we proceeded to Riyadh where we continue to make our home. Due to my husband’s position with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, we have a lovely home within the Ministry’s (MOFA) housing compound which is centrally located within the Mohamadiyah district of Riyadh.

For me, it was easy to adapt to Riyadh and life in Saudi in general. My eyes were open prior to arrival and I knew of the cultural changes I would need to adapt such as wearing an abaya (long black robe) whenever I went out in public. And when it was prudent to do so, I would also cover my hair with a hijjab (head cover). I also adapted quite well and easily to the fact that I could not drive as women are prohibited from driving in the Kingdom. Given the congestion on the roadways and the limitations at parking lots I enjoyed being driven to the door or to the curb for appointments and simply calling when I wished to be picked up instead of looking for my car and fighting through traffic.

It was not an issue that I did not have fluent Arabic when arriving in Riyadh. Saudi Arabia is a melting pot with individuals from all over the world and many of them do speak English. English is also the language used by medical staff at the majority of hospitals in Saudi too. However it is recommended learning Arabic and I was fortunate to have a small army of volunteer teachers within my extended Saudi family. With their assistance, I learned to read, write and speak Arabic.

While there are distinct differences in the way things are done in Saudi Arabia, I never found myself without. All needs and wants are easily met. The selections of shops are endless and I can easily obtain products from home (America) as well as from Europe, Asia, elsewhere within the GCC and South America too. I did need to learn how to conduct my shopping and errands around the Islamic prayer times as shops, businesses and other facilities typically will close down for 30 minutes during each prayer.

I found that as an American national in Saudi Arabia there were multiple opportunities for me in the workforce. Anyone who lives in Saudi Arabia must have a Saudi sponsor. In my case it was my husband and not a specific employer. Having my husband as my sponsor also gave me more flexibility to pick and choose opportunities in the Saudi workforce. I am a media consultant for Saudi Television Channel 2 where I have conducted special interviews and hosted programs. I also worked in Saudi’s medical and educational sector. Additionally I continue to undertake consulting projects which are of interest and apply to my core skills. Because Saudi Arabia is now my second home, it gives me pleasure to work and make a contribution for Saudi organizations. I also like the opportunity to interact with Saudis and get the opportunities to learn more about Saudis and Saudi Arabia.

Saudi Arabia does have many hidden treasures and such a rich long history. While at first blush it may appear that Riyadh is a dry and dull city that’s not the case at all. There are many activities suiting anyone’s taste. For the nature lover there are desert picnics, fossil hunting, geo-caching, bird-watching, hiking, sand skiing and much more. For the history lover there is the old town of Diriyah which is home to the ruling family of Al-Saud. In addition Riyadh has a magnificent National Museum which takes one through the history of the Kingdom from its earlier past all the way to the present. Sports lovers can enjoy the King Fahad Stadium where some of the most popular soccer teams compete. And of course one does not want to miss a visit to the King Abdullah Equestrian Centre where one can see the Arabian thoroughbred in all its magnificence.

Saudis are private individuals in general but at the same time take great pride in showing hospitality to guests. It is an honor getting to know a Saudi and enjoying fresh khawa (coffee) and tumir (dates) with them. Saudis are not only hospitable but very charming and sincere.

Just like when anyone knows they will be going to a new and unknown destination, do your homework! And go to the new location with a positive attitude. If customs and traditions are different from what you have experienced, learn from the differences in the practices. Always keep an open mind and see the positive in each new travel experience.

For additional information about Saudi Arabia, I invite you to visit my blog, American Bedu, where I write daily about the customs, cultures, practices and traditions as well as the reality of daily life in Saudi Arabia. And of course, www.teachsaudi.com is the best place for learning and seeking opportunities in Saudi’s education sector.

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